Where there are bathrooms, there’s bathroom humor. And to go along with the poop jokes, we’ve wrangled up some plumber jokes. Most people think plumbing is a fairly new invention. After all, many of us still remember our grandparents’ or great-grandparents’ stories of mid-winter outhouse excursions. However, the world’s need for a plumber actually goes back centuries. In America, Boston’s Tremont Hotel was the first to boast indoor plumbing in 1829. Before that, Queen Elizabeth I had what’s believed to be the first flushing toilet. It was installed in 1596 and built by her cousin, John Harrington. Fun! Even further back in time, around 2500 B.C., the Pyramid of Cheops in Egypt had indoor plumbing.
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In other words, plumbing has been around seemingly forever — which means there’s long been a need for plumbers. While not all plumbing work involves toilets (sinks and tubs use pipes, too!), plumbing still seems like a pretty gross job. We don’t envy our plumbers, but we sure do appreciate them, right? So, we rouned up these jokes specific to the world of plumbing.
Best Plumbing Jokes and Puns
What do plumbers, garbagemen, and economists all have in common? They all deal with gross domestic product.
How did the plumber feel when he gave blood? Drained.
Why was the plumber depressed? His career was going down the toilet.
What’s the one thing professional poker players and plumbers can agree on? A royal flush is better than a full house.
Why’d the plumber retire early? He was flushed with success.
What do plumbers have when they fall asleep? Pipe dreams.
What vegetable do plumbers hate? Leeks.
Why did the plumber fall asleep on the job? His work was draining.
I used to be a plumber, but now I’m a missionary. I bless the drains down in Africa.
What’s the one thing you’ll never see a plumber do? Bite his nails.
Why do plumbers wear green suspenders? To keep their pants up. Why else?
What rocks while it flushes? A rocking chair toilet.
What do you call a room full of cynical plumbers? A skeptic tank.
A plumber was called in to fix a leaky pipe in the library toilet. As he worked, he made too much noise, and so the librarian asked him to pipe down.
How many plumbers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to get the beer and one to call the electrician.
What’s the difference between a doctor and a plumber? A doctor washes his hands after he has gone to the toilet, but a plumber washes his hands before. (Ew. And hopefully afterward, too!)
Why do Scotsmen never call a plumber? Because they are pipers themselves.
A plumber fixes a damaged pipe in a doctor’s house and asks for 200 dollars. The doctor says to him: “Even I don’t make so much money in such a short period. And I’m a doctor”. And the plumber goes: “I know sir. I used to be a doctor myself.”
What’s a plumber’s favorite casino game? Craps.
A man at a train stop shows off pictures of his three sons to a friend. “What do your boys do for a living?” asked the man. “Well my youngest is a neurosurgeon and my middle is a lawyer,” he replied. “What does the oldest do?” the man asked. The father replied, “He’s the plumber that put them through school.”
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